Doors creaking, wind blowing, sounds of ghosts – all these thoughts have gripped Anjali as she is sitting at the corner of her dark bedroom, gripping the head of her husband Rahul, which is kept on her lap. She is scared in this horrifying state, with no one to come to her rescue. Even her husband’s company isn’t enough.
Three years ago, Anjali fell in love with Rahul, a software engineer. And as it happens generally, they got married and settled together in Mumbai. Everything was like a dream come true for them. Every morning was full of surprises, smiles and love. So were the nights and most of the daytime. She was living so many moments and making so many memories, that its hard to hold them without spilling. But when your life is on the peak, why would you care to remember sweet old memories when every moment is a memory.
Today, there is nothing left but those memories. Its not that their love is lost or they quarrel a lot. Actually, this is the time when they love each other the most. Still some issues remain. She hasn’t heard his voice since an year now. And it has been that long since he said something to her in any other form.
When they got engaged, they used to talk all day all night and beyond it. People say how much can you talk to a person, and about what. But they proved everyone wrong. Whatever came to her heart, she used to pour out on him. And he used to guide her well, protecting her from the world, coming to her rescue whenever she needed support and so on. He was the one whom she used to run to for anything and everything.
She keeps his head on her lap and keeps looking at him. Sometimes she smiles at him, kisses him. And sometimes, suddenly she’d start crying, as if pleading for something. Eventually, they’d both be in tears, helplessly lonely.
Rahul had gone away for some meeting for a week, and both of them were longing to meet. He had a flight on Sunday morning, but Anjali couldn’t wait that long. She kept on asking him to make it earlier. Finally, he gave up and took a Saturday evening flight. The flight got a little delayed due to rains. Rahul reached Mumbai at 2 am. Anjali was worried all night, waiting for him to call up.
Her half awake scared state was only broken by a phone ring in the morning. They told her that Rahul’s body was found in his car, which had smashed into a tree at 2:30 am. Her heart sank. She thought she had lost him. But fate didn’t have something that easy for her in store.
A month later, doctors told Anjali that Rahul’s spine was completely crushed in the accident. He can still hear her and see her. But neither can he speak or do anything else below his neck. Since that day to now, every night she sleeps crying with him, thinking of all the old memories, trying to recollect his voice, his touch, his love.
…. competence intention trust stability happiness uncertainty fear rejection responsibility doubt myself ….. Whenever I read Devansh’s (aka Deboo) blog, I feel that I am drowning in a tag cloud of these words. As if each and every word screaming at me, urging me to understand the depth of things, the undeniable truth. Still, I let myself argue in disbelief and objection to these laws set forth before me, that define and guide the life of all human beings.
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